Anyway, i just returned home from the clinic cause my bro was "sick" and i accompanied him for the checkup. Erm... in case you're wondering why the " " mark, well it is because i dun really think my bro is sick, i find that it is just one of his usual/ common symptoms that occur every year. So... i dun really think it is something that major or even something to be worried about.

Ok, main topic now, Like i was saying, i just return from the clinic and as i was like under my block, my mum said "Asher! got alot of "xiao qiang" " And tons of memories just suddenly gushed in to me. I remembered the times where my parents and the people around me used to describe roaches( i have no idea how to spell "kor-kroach") as disgusting life sucking creatures that everyone is avoiding. So I kind of grew up with the thought that roaches are scary things and to make things simple, I was just afraid of roaches and various other creepy crawlies, they just freak me out. Probably it is the environment that i grew up in? i dunno, but by the time i was around 15 years of age. I was told to suddenly be some kind of ghost buster and elliminate every roach or creepy crawlies that i see. I assure you, i freaked out badly on my first mission. My first target was this lizard, crawling around on the floor of the house, everyone was at home but no one wanted to help. My dad said i gotta "be a man" and kill the lizard(since when did killing a lizard became a criteria for being a man?). My mum, sis and bro was like 10 metres away from the lizard and they acted like the lizard was in their mouth or something. Ok, my sis did not react that way, but i assure you my mum and bro did, they like hid away in some corner of the house as though the lizard was some meat eating zombie hunting down it's prey. So there i was, around a metre or two away from the lizard with a insecticide in my hand and I am like spamming away on the insecticide. The lizard was basically drowning in the sea of insecticide around him. But in the end i failed in taking his life. My dad brought him to his grave though.

I think the first time i killed some crawlies was the time when i was so pissed off by my brother i think. that time i was in the lift and I'm so irritated by my brother, as the lift door opened, some roach came crawling over towards the lift, and i just stomped on it and killed it flat. Firstly, i was scared to death and i was also mad. The second reason why i sort of like just killed the roach was probably cause i did not want to hear the screams of my bro and i just prevented that from happening by killing the roach. So... that's my "first blood". hahas

After that i was like placed in-charge of killing every pest that showed their face at home. Each time some roach, lizard or some paranormal creatures appear at home, I will have to either chase it out or kill it on the spot. Once again, I freaked out. Cause it was a whole new thing for me, it's like i was raised to be afraid of those things and now i have to face my fears? scary~ I actually did spend some time thinking about it, like overcoming my fear of those disgusting things(Seriously, who spends time thinking about such senseless stuffs? i guess i ave too much time). Then it occurred to me this scene in a cartoon that i used to watched-shaolin showdown. It is a very nice show for kids, if any of you have like kids at home, you should let your kids watch it, it is nice :) Back to topic, so anyway, there was this episode where the bad guys actually took possession of a item that enables the user to drown any person-of-choice in their own fears. In that very episode, the characters actually said this: "It is ok to have fears, everyone has them, but facing your fear is not something that everyone possesses" To simply put it, it means that having your fears is one thing, but to actually face them, is another. So from there I actually told myself that Yes, i am afraid of roaches and stuff but I am not gonna be afraid to face them. for the sake of like protecting those around me, I have gotta grow stronger(definitely not physically, I am like overweight-i think). So i practically murdered everyone pest i see. Even until now, i am still afraid of those crawlies but.. I am ready to face them. So... yea for all you people out there, if you have any fears or anything similar, remember not to be afraid to face your fears!

Ok, it is 2330hrs now and i gotta go do my art, furthermore, there is school tomorrow, so... goodnight people! sweet dreams~